Well, lately I was kind of hurt by the advent of a relationship. Not on my part, no I'd be kind of weirdly happy about it and somewhat giddy. No, the guy that I was having some kind of intense platonic feelings for..at least to the point where I'd pursue some sort of platonic partnership with him. He has a girlfriend now. I wish I could have told him how I felt. And I regret not doing so a hell of a lot. But there really is nothing I can do about it. I can only hope for the best for those two and kind of move on. Does this mean I don't have feelings for him anymore? I doubt it, I still dream about him every now and again. but at the same time I've been focusing my dreams on fictional characters again so..that's nothing new for me. So I don't know where I want to do now, this is just rather strange. I seem to be over it maybe because the nature of it was mostly platonic with affection, there wasn't some kind of overly strong attachment when it couldn't happen. I did cry and for a few hours I was a bit of a wreck. But, now I'm just kind of quietly indifferent. Though sometimes, I inwardly pretend to gag when I see the guy and his girlfriend get a little ...cuddly to the point where I think they might kiss. They never do,but I really fear that day somehow. I don't even really know what to say about that anymore. I guess I don't have much to say regarding that.
As for fictional characters, well lately there's been this remake of the Lorax. I haven't even seen it..and frankly I don't much care to when I figured out a bit of the changes made. Still, I find myself drawn to the villain, the once-ler. See..um the movie made him into a human, a rather attractive one at that. And he has an awesome voice which took me by surprise when I listened to his songs from the movie..and a few clips with his speaking voice. It's really just.. very attractive. Sorry if I'm using to many eclipses, I do have this kind of pause in my thinking which I feel compelled to express in my writing somehow. So this results rather than some .-pause- It's not like I'm roleplaying right now. But I just thought I'd bring that up since I've been having dreams about him lately..and alternate versions of him. It gets rather complex and I won't describe what goes on in those dreams because they get a little much for me. Not necessarily sexual, but it gets very suggestive to say the least.
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